Expanded Version on Another Emotion (Calmness)

Introduction

Calmness or remaining calm is a combination of physiological control, cognitive skills and behavioural habits. The more practised these are, the more automatic calmness becomes.

A. Physiological Regulation (Control the Body and Brain)

Stress starts as a body response. Calming the body interrupts the fight–flight pathway.

Tools

1. Box breathing (4-4-4-4)
   Inhale 4 seconds, hold 4 seconds, exhale 4 seconds and hold 4 seconds. This reduces cortisol and restores clarity.
2. Extended exhale breathing
   Breathe in 4 seconds, breathe out 6 to 8 seconds. Extended exhale activates the parasympathetic nervous system.
3. Relax your muscles consciously
   Drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, soften your tongue. Body cues “tell” the brain that you are safe.
4. Grounding techniques

·         5–4–3–2–1 sensory grounding (it is a mindfulness-based grounding exercise that uses the 5 senses (see, feel, hear, smell & taste) to pull attention away from anxiety, being overwhelm or emotional flooding and back into the present moment.

(for more detail see elsewhere in Knowledge Base).

·         Press feet into the floor, which helps stop spiralling thoughts.

B. Cognitive Regulation (Control the Mind to Control the Interpretation)

Calmness comes from managing internal narratives.

Tools

1. Name the emotion
   “I am feeling overwhelmed/frustrated/uncertain.”
   Naming emotions reduces amygdala activation.
2. Reframe the moment
   Replace: “This is a disaster.”
   With: “This is a challenge I can break down.”
   Reframing shifts the brain into problem-solving mode.
3. Use the ‘control test’
   Ask:
• What is in my control?
• What is outside my control?
  Focusing only on what you can influence builds calm agency.
4. Slow down cognitive speed
   Use deliberate pauses before reacting.
   Even 3 seconds prevents impulsive decisions.

C. Behavioural Regulation (Calm Action to Calm Outcomes)

Tools

1. Create micro-boundaries
• Step away
• Take a walk
• Delay a decision
  Regulation happens faster when the environment isn’t escalating stress.
2. Use structured thinking
   For example:
• What is the issue?
• What are the options?
• What is the simplest next step?
  Structure reduces emotional noise.
3. Maintain consistent routines
   Sleep, hydration, movement.
   NB Calmness is the outcome of a regulated lifestyle.

D. Mindset Habits (Learn Calmness Like a Skill)

Calmness is a capacity that grows with repetition.

1. Accept uncertainty (not everything needs resolution immediately).
2. Practise mindfulness or brief daily reflection.
3. Reduce catastrophising through evidence-based thinking.
4. Use gratitude to counterbalance negativity bias.
5. Build recovery rituals (breathing, journaling, walking, etc).

(main source: Jacqueline Brassey et al, 2022)